she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I would like to remind you that Mike's hard lemonade only goes good with an extra light cigarette and seminal fluid.
I feel like tequila is Gods way of lighting my fuse to do something awesome
The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I'm on my way back with the wine... And a puppy. It was free.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
you got in a fight with your imaginary friend last night when he didn't catch you after a surprise trust fall
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
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