Well the candle wax mightve been sexy if he didn't drop the candle and light half my bed on fire
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
sorry about calling you the devil all night.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Of course... Double fistin nati light cuz the powers out and it cuts down the times i gotta open the fridge... Genius
I was scared I had HIV after last time so I'm not gonna do it again
But he was really hot
Glad you don't have HIV
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
Yo I'm lookin at the cows. They're just fucking docile things
Dear god my vagina.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
I admire the fact that you replicated my apartment on the roof but I would appreciate it more if you would move all my stuff off the roof and back into my apartment.
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