I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Too bad my thesis topic isn't "defining a hot mess: a study in drinking, smoking and other bad life decisions."
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
He tricked me into going on a double date with him, I don't like that he's not using me for just sex anymore
they knew we were both to shy to do anything so they got us drunk and locked us in the back yard with a tent. it was fuck or freeze
you have the best friends
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Sex in your truck helped me start regaining feeling in my jaw. Thanks!
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
I once broke a mans heart just to get laid by a premature ejaculator
My drug dealer just told me goodnight...I still don't know his name. But I guess you can say we've moved to the next step.
Randomize
