it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Living room yoga. I'm too hungover to deal with anyone else's chi today.
I just ate a can of beans for dinner so I can afford to go get a 5$ bottle of wine. I really did not think these choices would still be necessary at age 25.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
Some lady found my secret pooping bathroom at work. Do I fight her Highlander style? I made or may not be fashioning a crude sword from seat covers and toilet paper rolls.
Do it. DO IT. There can be only one.
And the next morning he asked me why I had clothes on so I said so that he could take them off again.
The only thing I had in my freezer before today was patron and cheese.
Have I told you i love you?
there's no need we are two peas in a naughty pod of fuckery
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