haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
I drank like a thousand beers last night and my poo is solid, not gross like usual. I think this means I've grown up.
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
We have 10 gallons of home brew. And james has an amazonian blow dart weapon that sticks in bags and the wall. Come over
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
Randomize
