I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
She woke me up, whispered "I like the size of your dick", kissed me, and rolled over and went back to sleep
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
we shared soup. that is literally the extent of my romantic life right now
The lady at target couldn't scan my grocery item and just looked at me and said "just take it. I hate this fucking place". Best munchie adventure yet.
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I was looking at the storm clouds during my run and one oddly resembled ur penis
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
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