I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
don't you miss dr. quinn: medicine woman? i do.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
When sleeping with someone new: should you hide the magnum condoms, or let him know what he has to live up to?
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
So really what you're asking for is an allowance to not have sex on our futon.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
If body pillows had a built in vibrator attached I would literally never need a boyfriend again
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
Randomize
