people will do anything to get on MTV. like get pregnant.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
just went back to the bar and asked if they found a shoe last night.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
I just chugged whiskey at 7 AM because going to breakfasts at Brendas doesnt seem right if Im not real drunk. I feel like when Brenda takes my order she can tell Im drunk and will take care of me.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
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