is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Basically I learned last night that if you're too polite people will think it's okay to play with your nipples when really its not even a little okay
i've never been that scared in my life. i ran naked into the corner and he just stood there trying to shield his boner from the light.
I am the prescription. I can be taken orally or vaginally and in any dosage. This is why I went to med school.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
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