Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
He raised his arm and dropped it in his sleep to smack himself awake. He knows his phone has an alarm clock right?
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
these are times I'm glad I'm Jewish because the Torah is just like "drink, eat, and fuck"
Id prob hit it, but i instagram edited her picture to make her look better. Ha. She should fuck me just for that.
I have someone saved in my phone as "This Hoe Ain'tit' Loyal" and I'm missing my superman boxers. Explain.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
We played wedding bingo. I made out with the maid of honor and fucked one of the bride’s sorority sisters. But I needed to get with the groom’s cousin, a mother-in-law to be, or the wedding planner to win and I came up short.
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