i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Then you started asking people on the drunk bus if they knew the word "gumption". if they didn't you told them they weren't taking advantage of their high education opportunities and you were disappointed in them.
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Today I learned I and my bar naps were the subject of a bar meeting.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
You'll be pleased to know I just had an elaborate day dream about your penis. you were there too.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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