So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
Don't worry we did the "promise to get an abortion" handshake
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
Survival tip #3: while you're hooking up with him, don't say he reminds you of his brother
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
And then before we had sex he was quoting space jam to me
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
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