is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
Found my smoke alarm in a ziploc in my toilet...again
im pretty sure your bra is in my room hanging on my shark pinata
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
He came over to use the microwave, said he needed to heat up some urine.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
So... How much of our rent is drug money?
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
