Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
He told me I smelled like fruit loops and then bit me on the tit
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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