I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
When I woke up in the parking lot today I decided it is not a good idea to hang out with you anymore.
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
Update: I may or may not be in a cult
Update #2: I may or may not be the leader of said cult
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
she's fucked both of my roommates but not me. i feel like I'm not part of the group anymore
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize
