Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I would give away a ton of these clothes but I doubt there are any homeless people who dress as slutty as me
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
you never know what sharing a kayak could lead to
It's true
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
Can you please venmo me emergency money? i have no pants.
I just took a condom out of my purse and opened it in front of my entire family because I thought it was a wetnap. Way too hungover for family brunch.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Now I know Sunday Funday means fucking till you loose your voice.
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