I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
why do you have a stuffed bear wearing a thong and a seatbelt in your backseat??
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
what the fuck is a social media consultant, who does she consult for, and how bad is she at it? her facebook account is currently hacked and posting ads for the ipad 2 on my newsfeed
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
I wasn't that drunk, I know my limits. When peeing became difficult I stopped taking shots.
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
It really went downhill when you started writing IOU on pieces of napkins. Giving them to the strippers
Real life dumb and dumber
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
