OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
this morning my mom told me to get a new vibrator because mine was too loud last night
i fell asleep watchin iron chef that was the blender she heard. i dont even own a vibrator
i know you like preteen girls so i'm gonna offer you some advice...dump a bucket of glitter on yourself and walk into the sunlight. they will come running.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
No. I want him to marry me so we can spend our lives together. I also want a to-scale model of his genitals to mount above my fireplace
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
I tried to flirt with him by saying "catholics are cool" and he handed me a cup of water so i called him jesus and thanked him for the wine
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
A relationship is waiting for him to fall asleep so you can cum (finally!) while watching porn
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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