I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
in hindsight, $10 Malibu buckets were a terrible idea...
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
What changed your mind?
Being sober
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Randomize
