is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
We sat in your minivan all night in a parking lot pretending we were in the magic school bus going to the sun
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
