mom and grandma are in town. grandma wants to get drunk with you
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
It's 4/20 of course I'm going to smoke in the portapotty and be ripped outta my mind at the lung cancer walk.
Odd start to the day - the FBI just showed up at my apartment.
My girlfriend is talking to my ex-boyfriend at the bar right now. I REPEAT, GIRLFRIEND IS TALKING TO EX BOYFRIEND RIGHT NOW. GET ME THE FUCK OUT OF THIS PLAACE
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
Randomize
