He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i looked at dads computer and apparently he was looking at job ads on craigslist and the only one clicked that turned purple said "GET PAID TO MASTURBATE"
Just slept with my boyfriend's roomie to learn if bf was cheating on me
Good plan. When in doubt, sleep about.
You weren't just peeing. You were like grinding on it. And you tried to pee in the washing machine first.
Mission get my tooth back and find a new dick to ride starts after i sleep for the first time in 2 days.
I sang again at the bar lastnight I don't think alanis morrset knew when she wrote you outta know that the drunk version was going to be go fuck yourself Josh and Chelsea. I love $2 wells.
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
Note to self: don't tell your girlfriends dad you can have his daughter in bed by ten and home by midnight. He doesnt find it funny
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
he has pokemon bedsheets but his dick is huge so i took one for the team
Randomize
