you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
Btw, I'm really high so I apologize if anything I say gets translated into arabic.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
Take off that red sweater and wear my vagina as a facemask.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize