Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I literally sat down and peed with my underwear still on. How does that happen?
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
Uh yeah. I ate a brick of cheese. Didn't even cut it. We were admiring the teeth marks I was leaving. We decided it was the negative of my mouth
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
At 10 PM you were shit faced in the kitchen makin nachos... Naked. I wasn't sure what to do besides walk away...
Randomize
