We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
She's the rare girl who loses weight and gets uglier.
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
you kept going on about how you couldnt haven been the one throwing up because you were peeing in circles.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
I have unfollowed so many people the only things showing up in my newsfeed are dog rescues and sloth memes
Randomize
