A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
Its the Friday before break. There are 20 kids in my 300 person lecture hall. All with the same what the fuck am I doing here look on there face.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
If I can't pick up a cat lady, I probably need to turn to Internet dating.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
I want a bottle of whiskey to be dropped at my doorstep like a stork drops babies when they are delivered to their parents.
God what have you done to be that much in need of alcohol.
Me WANTS my preciousssssssssss
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
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