Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
So I just introduced myself to this guy in front of me and now he's saving my pictures on facebook to his phone..
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Dunno why I keep hitting snooze. It's never gonna give me the kind of sleep I need to be sober.
Whenever we go out my brain flips on autopilot, straight to blackout.
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
Went upstairs to make PopTarts, found the door open. Shut it. Saw a grey thing. Opened the door, found a girl sleeping outside. What the fuck happened last nigh
Randomize
