During sex she told me I could do anything I wanted to her. You remember that toy lightsaber we bought at Wal Mart?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
She gave me a handjob while eating a mcdouble with mayo on the way home from the bars at 2 in the morning. Car was full of people. This could be forever
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
no you're not allowed back
come on. everbeers was a great idea. you fucks had a great night
STOP TELLING PEOPLE I PEED ON YOU
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
How do you clean human pee out of a carpet
Inconspicuously
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
