For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
If penises could fly, my ass would totally be an airport.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
ever since I turned 21 the mother-daughter bonding sessions always end with whiskey and my little pony. I don't know why, it's just a thing that happens
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
What's the best way to tell a guy he can call me when his impending divorce is finalized?
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
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