How is your vagina???
Double booked
With your butt?
Totes, candlesticks and all
Yay!!
I murdered the dance floor call the cops
i just stumbled downstairs, still drunk, to hug my dad and wish him a happy fathers day
but fathers day is next sunday
i realized that after i threw up on his bare feet
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
i gave him head before the novacaine wore off...i think his penis touched my lung
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Just smoked pot with a guy who has apparently been living in the woods for over a month. He just walked out of the woods. This is not real life.
Your text makes more sense read in reverse.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
This guy needs to stop asking about my feet
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
