he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
I hope he didn't notice that my shirt was inside out when I told him I didn't have sex with the guy. Kind of a dead giveaway.
U took a sewing needle to his nipple
Psshh,
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I don't actually like you. I just want to hook up with you.
I'm fine with that
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