NEED BACKUP we are in the kitchen arguing about who would win in fight against lil Wayne and snoop dog
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Just got an email from TMobile. Said they were going to pursue "more qualified" candidates. So this is what rock bottom feels like.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
Sometimes I really think that if... When your stoned you have a catlike ability to just relax in any position
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.
I will most likely miss you the least and fondly remember you as Mr. "I need a minute" but really need 24 hours and 4 extra inches.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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