DUDE DUDE I JUST GOT TH E BEST IDEA FOR A CHILDRENS BOOK "If You Give A Girl A Blow Job"
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
Look at it this way: if he'll have sex with a tomato, he'll have sex with you.
Ok... I'm a little jealous... Grab her pig tails and ride her like a jet ski. Making motor noises is optional.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I will give you 100$, a blow job a day for a month and I will shave my legs according to societal standards until next November if you come recuse me from my night class right NOW.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
What part of "he tried to put his dick in my ear" did you not understand??
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
