if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I know. I just don't want anything else. I have no other desire. Just a ham sandwich.
I honestly don't know what to make of that.
A ham sandwich would be nice.
Hahaha you puked all over his shirt.
You puked in the planter and everyone saw your snatch.
Well someones bitter they didn't get any.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
The only thing I know is that these arent my shoes and Aaron is missing and he has my house keys.
I just saw a guy in a hazmat suit riding a tractor.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
i don't know how to react to you in a diaper crying and calling a football 'sadie'.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I should've negotiated that before I sat on his face.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
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