How do you feel about the band name "O'labia Newton John"??
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Random memory from the wedding, the bartender showed us how to open the windows and piss out of them.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
I think people are normalizing furries
Thanks for ruining my life with your man penis
Randomize
