ready 4 sex 2nite?
wow. woo me matt, woo me.
it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
I want her autograph on my taint
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
Buy Actually if the police need to find my body I'm on an air mattress in an apartment near a McDonald's that's all I see out dat Window
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
I don't care how hot she is, her cat has pissed on me twice.
So what are you going to be for halloween?
A woman sitting on her couch watching Hocus Pocus.
I have a story for you. It involves waffles and getting naked with the local weatherman.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
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