Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
you started putting condoms on anything with a point, then you were yelling at the lamp for using your last condom...
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
The girls danced. I drank. Then I danced cause I was drunk. Then I ripped tim's shirt off cause I'm awesome.
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
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