She had a bottle of NAIR in her bathroom, but she clearly hadn't been using it.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
How am I supposed to stop smoking pot when girl scout cookies are being sold.
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I will pee on everything he values.
dude, no lie, I would make out with you in front of them wearing nothing but a rainbow colored speedo
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
He put those pics of him with those girls on facebook and tagged his wife in them
Tequila 1 marriage 0
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
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