i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
both roomates are passed out on the floor. I feel like I'm missing out on crucial bonding time by sleeping in my bed.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
I hope your pay increase has gone through because I might need bail. This is not what I dreamed adulthood would be like.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I didn't know what happened last night until the bruises in the shape of hands showed up on my boobs. Then it all made sense.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I love how when they see that I'm upset their initial response is to offer me ecstasy
His roommates are gone so we had sex in every room of the house and watched the wire. What have you done today?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
I'm gonna ask his dad. Weed trumps broken heart any day.
Randomize
