I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
Stop staring at my boobs, I can't concentrate
Well how do you think I feel
fair enough
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
Is that a polar bear? You seriously grinded with a polar bear at the club?
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
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