dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
facebook friend requested him the morning after while he was still asleep in my bed, a whole new level of creeper even for me
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Hey, this is Travis. I just so intelligently deduced that I am in a college dorm somewhere in western oregon. Probably WOU, based on the process of elimination.
just peed in rthe mens room but seranaeded them with adelle the whole timee so they didnt mind
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Rule of thumb; if you ask me if my tits are fake you will not get to touch them.
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
Randomize
