Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Well I took a spicy wing shit in a field this morning.
He started making out with my boobs. I didn't know whether to be proud of my boobs or ashamed of my mouth.
Who put the fucking tampon in my Mike's hard lemonade?
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I drank too much tequila. I'm hyperventilating. Send help. I think I slipped through satan's asshole.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
I did cocaine with my cab driver all night. It was the best date.
Randomize
