just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
He is to the point where he forgot I was in the front seat of his car while he was taking me home...that stoned
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
He just kept screaming "I have democratic immunity" as the cops dragged him into the car.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
Sexting my TA in lecture = awesome
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
Jesus fucking Mary Christ if I have to clean shit out of my fucking bathtub one more fucking time I'm gonna murder a fucking kitten
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