I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
so when we got to the frat house he had a travel sized toothpaste and toothbrush for me and gave me a pair of his shorts and a girl's sorority t shirt...something tells me he's done this before
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
He left a trail of vomit straight from our dorm to the bathroom. Looks like we have our identities for the rest of the year.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
Jesus, I think this onesie was designed to keep me from masturbating.
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Sooo i'm debating posing nude for the drawing and painting classes, I just wanna see if they draw my nip ring.
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
