White coat. Heels.
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
well, duh, but it's like you don't even want to see me masturbate with a wine bottle.
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
My hair is crimped, I am walking with a roadie, and my vibrator is in my purse. I feel sorry for tomorrow.
She was just a sweet cute intern for us until I saw her naked in my bed the day after the Christmas party
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Maybe is for pussies. We only say yes in this household
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
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