Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
I get a nice feeling when i open my fridge and see it filled with thirty beers and half a leftover jimmy johns pickle.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
well one of us has to be wrong and it's not going to be me
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
Randomize
