Dan is more possessive of me than a Michael Jackson is of McCully Caulkin
was*
True, R.I.P.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
The night was doomed the minute I started taking shots with an apple as a chaser.
Is it bad that we're talking like nothing happened?
Ah. Blossoming love after wild blackout drunk sex.
You may or may not have poured bacon fat down her shirt
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
Worst luck of my entire life. Came in my own mouth
Call me something sexy & ethnic. Like jasmine. But mystical too. Like Mermaid Jasmine. And throw Glitter somewhere in there too.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
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