you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
I was on hold waiting for customer service at verizon so we obviously we had enough time to have sex, i just put the phone on speaker
Any day you don't mysteriously wake up in the garbage is a good day.
I think I've reached that age where I should start dating "congrats" and not "are you keeping it?"
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
Lobby closes at 2 AM on Thursday, but everyone walking still wants food... I could run a "Taco Bell Taxi" when I clock off at 2 and charge a dollar to give drunks a ride through drive thru.
Someones thought of a way to afford tuition.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
