1:12am: That's just how i roll, and this dress she is wearing is dirty and needs to get pulled over her head.
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Nothing like waking up and having two guys who aren't your boyfriend talk to you about their hard dicks before 9 am.
You mom sent me some article linking anal sex, damaged prostates and sterility. Does she still think your gonna go straight and have kids one day?
She made me watch three musicals and then told me she was too tired for me to stay over. I think I'm being punished but I have no clue what I did.
Randomize
