Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
remember to ask your mom about the name of her pet duck so we can name the bowl
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
I hate find pieces of condom wrappers on carpet. It's like god is throwing flakes of shame for me to vacuum up
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
Hmmm. I never knew the difference. I've done either one and had stronger or weaker versions but usually if i took enough, i tripped balls. That should be a PSA for kids... if you take drugs and the drugs are weak, just take more drugs... The More You Know
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
ATTENTION PENIS' OF BURLINGTON: I AM COMING FOR YOU
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
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